07/08
As the laptop does it’s internal thing, I’m surrounded by the hum of the fireplace, (old, noisy, yet efficient), radio tunes and the ever succulent thrum of wind and rain. Sounds soaking down, through and within, bringing green transformations, future abundance and ease to the farmer’s mind. Three faithful furry companions curl up beside me. My eye is caught by reflections of birds flitting, enjoying the winter shower outside. My mind wanders, nothing unusual there. I’m prone to distraction and grey, wet skies make me pensive. Natural cleansing and replenishing as nature washes and refreshes her pores, she extends her transformative energy out to us.
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In the whys
In the wonderings In the chatterings What is to understand? What are the chances that at any given moment those sparks of light will slowly or quickly fade to nothing and extinguish? Hard + fast + defiance ≠ invincible Equality is inevitable We are our own makers We choose our own adventures There is no protection from yourself Curiosity will make you Or break you You choose your own adventure Random words, streams of consciousness and top ten questions. Find a book open randomly write down the first word you see repeat this 8 times write a poem using these nine words Julia Cameron refers to free writing as her morning pages and recommends writing 3 pages every morning, for Leonardo it was stream of consciousness, for Zohab Zee Kahn, it's a brain dump. Whatever you call it and however you do it, free writing is a release. Writing is a release! Creating and making is a release! Let's map it out. I love using mind maps to sort out my thoughts and ideas. It's like brainstorming on paper, you can even make it pretty and colourful. With the energy of the full moon above us, write the word RELEASE in the middle of your page and circle it. What gives you release? Is there something or someone you need to release? Branching out, write all the associations that come to mind from this word...release yourself! Last week I introduced Leo’s Curiosita from the book How to Think Like Leonardo Da Vinci by Michael Gelb. Did you manage to write your 100 questions? I am still looking for which notebook I wrote mine in! Here are the next steps; Review your list of a hundred questions. Choose the ten that seem most significant. Then rank them in importance from one to ten. (Of course, you can add new questions or change the order at any time.) Do not attempt to answer them right now; you’ve done enough just putting them in writing in a place where you can easily find them. Ten Power Questions The following questions are drawn from different people’s “top ten.” These questions are powerful catalysts to personal growth and fulfilment. Copy them in your notebook for contemplation: When am I most naturally myself? What people, places, and activities allow me to feel most fully myself? What is one thing I could stop doing, or start doing, or do differently, starting today that would most improve the quality of my life? What is my greatest talent? How can I be paid for doing what I love? Who are my most inspiring role models? How can I best be of service to others? What is my heart’s deepest desire? How am I perceived by: my closest friend, my worst enemy, my boss, my children, my co- workers, etc.? What are the blessings of my life? What legacy would I like to leave? How Does a Bird Fly? Choose one of the following topics inspired by Da Vinci’s passionate questioning: a bird in flight, flowing water, the human body, a landscape, reflected light, a knot or braid. In your journal, ask at least ten questions about it. Again, there’s no need to write answers; in Curiosità, we focus on the questions. For example: How does a bird fly? Why does it have two wings? Why does it have feathers? How does it “take off”? How does it slowdown? How does it accelerate? How high can it fly? When does it sleep? How good is its eyesight? What does it eat? Then choose a topic from your personal or professional life and do the same exercise — ask ten questions about your career, your relationship, your health. Record the questions in your journal—no answers yet, just questions. Like many things, my creative patterns and endeavours have transformed over the last few months. Writing and poetry have taken lead, so my head is full of thoughts and words. My voracious appetite for books and creativity continues to leave me befuddled, urging inspiration yet overwhelming action. Movement and distraction have impacted my creative pace and practice, too much or not enough. Reorganising required. Time to order and collate recent musings, to catch up on my self. May May was here and then, suddenly gone. Work resumed, though the rhythm and energy was shot. Adapting to pandemic changes was like a morphing process, initial changes happened in earnest, quickly, before we knew or realised how or what to do. Other changes came in waves, like our emotional state. A sense of restless stillness, a bittersweet limbo settled in. Simple daily comforts and pleasures became tainted with removed freedoms and the uncertainty of what the future might hold. I filled my head with creative writing. Amotissé keeping my thinking wired as I searched for inspiring prompts. It was a long awaited and timely reawakening. An online poetry course through futurelearn.com re-hooked patterns of painting with words, a welcome distraction while my focus was lopsided. Being well was hard with confused dynamics, people and places not their usual selves. Overall, people were well enough, yet anxiety seeped through the cracks, undermining positive flow and energy and resilience felt fragile like foundations after a tremor. We never know what we’re made of until action is required. Urgency brings out our best and worse. Action and inaction. An overall loss of expected movement led to a surge of unexpected movement. Balance swaying with mixed emotions and contradictions, positive and negative. June Behind the scenes these few months, my teenage twins have been home enduring lockdown with typical teenage relish! So when the rental application was approved and the timing I hoped for happened, we were ecstatic! Everything was quick after that. Packing, driving to the coast, signing the lease and moving them in! HUGE, EXCITING AND NERVE RACKING! Time felt fast and slow. Things fell into place as they do. Quicker than expected, they became free agents, the next stage or adventure begins for the three of us. July
I am now a true empty nester. I felt the emotion hit me as I waved to Artémis while the train pulled out from the station, knowing I wouldn’t see her again for months. I’m rarely lonely, though I’ll be happy sad for awhile. Getting ready to leave them to it. To accept, to not ask, to let them carry their own responsibilities. I am so excited for them. The incredible adventure of life continues to amaze me. It bestows such blessings. I feel maternally connected yet so separate, simultaneously. They are becoming their own selves in a modern digital age, ripe with pandemic and unknown challenges. Energy and momentum continues to shift. I felt powerless as endings and beginnings formed around me, leaving a stunned emotional wake behind them. As the repercussions of pandemic mayhem rippled through some of my close relationships, I’ve tried to remain as compassionately objective as I can, but mostly I’ve felt like a deer in headlights...no time to register before the impact. And we are all impacted. In ourselves, our interactions... Winter sunshine has been steady and comforting. Like a lizard, I’ve been basking in it on the front porch, with pots of tea, absorbing the warmth. That has been a constant. Bella, Batgirl and Ying have been constantcompany, keeping close by whenever I’m home and waiting patiently when I’m out. The holidays brought welcome movement, respite and indulgence. Sadly, the heaviness of emotional upset remains constanttoo. Poetry has been a new constant, as writing creatively continues to spur me on. As my focus shifts, I’m lagging in other creative pursuits. Sometimes it feels like the dimness is turned down. The view from here
Life humming, s t r e t c h e d o u t like a distant drone, monotone constant defining. Sounds like it feels, boxes you in, beyond your control. Reflections s t r e t c h o u t in the dark like dream twitchings, wisps of whispers to visit another day... Or never. Beyond your control, like the missing piece of an almost finished puzzle. By Tina Pech 2020 I was one of those kids who liked tracing things, especially letters. I loved reading and I remember walking about learning my spelling list words. In primary school I won merit certificates for my imaginative stories. I kept diaries or I tried, and I discovered the joys of pen pals when a friend moved away. I have a collection of paper, stationery and pens. I don’t write letters as often as I used to, but I still have a few pen pals, love dabbling in creative correspondence, mail art and mail tag.
Sadly, creative writing more or less stopped at high school. I kept the odd poem or essay and put a very cool pen pal ad in Countdown magazine. It wasn’t quite as instantaneous as social media but the letter box was crammed with letters for weeks! In fact for years I exchanged letters with friends regularly and have a box full of journals, letters and cards. I rummage through them occasionally, purging bits here and there. Writing became more important when I went overseas. Phoning was expensive and internet non existent, so I sent postcards, letters and non digital photos! Learning another language heightened my love of reading and writing. I only recall snippets of learning my first language but the impact of learning French remains strong indeed. Once I got it, I was hooked! That incredible click between understanding nothing, then suddenly everything is clear, with the added bonus of more books to read! Surprisingly, this is when I rediscovered my love of creative writing. I always take care to write correctly, however, writing in French allowed me a freedom from learned constraints and a whole new language structure to play with. I participated in workshops and quickly moved on to running them and studying creative writing at uni. It was a glorious floating in my bubble time, not without the daily nitty gritty, but wonderful nevertheless. So now that I am feeling linguistically nostalgic and not remembering why I started writing this...well, not completely. Sharing some of ourselves and learning more about others makes the creative process and experience powerful. It gives it life and that is something we can all use more of. A breath of creative life, zest and energy. I am always seeking out new perspectives.
I have a tendency of overthinking situations and often feel like I’ve missed something, that I’m over invested, over talking, over emotional, over acting... all of which leads to me and others, feeling overwhelmed! I listened to a meditation this week titled doing the best they can, from https://www.facebook.com/bodyandsoulretreats/ with Kelly Hine which shared the following thoughts; “All I know is that my life is better when I assume that people are doing their best. It keeps me out of judgment and lets me focus on what is, and not what should or could be.” ~Brené Brown Everyone is doing the best that they can with the understanding and resources they have. Adopting this belief changes our relationship to ourselves and to others. Deepak Chopra said, “People are doing the best that they can from their own level of consciousness. This was helpful because I am living with teenagers in isolation. I am full of assumptions, judgments, shoulds, why nots and lots of feeling disregarded and I just don’t get it! I’m not even sure what is right or wrong anymore...does it really matter if they sleep all day, stay up or night and not help much? Does it REALLY MATTER? And if it does, who does it matter to? It doesn’t matter for them, it only seems to matter to me. I’m the one letting myself be weighed down by feelings of sadness and disappointment. I mean if we are all happier and quieter doing our own thing, it’s obviously easier and nicer for everyone. Can I get by with minimums? Yes I can. Do I have to do everything for them? No I don’t. Can I see the positives? Yes I can, we are all safe, sound, comfortable and as well as can be expected. I don’t want to make excuses for laziness or a lack of consideration. I do want to let them live and learn. As a parent that means giving the benefit of the doubt, accepting, adapting, allowing...myself as much as them! It isn’t easy but if I look through a different lens and focus on the positive, on love, on what I have, what I’m grateful for, all the rest seems obsolete. Before too long they will fly free back into the world. They’ll get it right, make mistakes and figure it out as they go. So for now I’LL DO MY BEST to enjoy my hibernating zombie vampire teenagers in all their adolescent glory! As we settle deeper into isolation I am keeping the focus as relaxed, positive and creative as possible.
Even so, I’m hit regularly by emotional waves of frustration and sadness that tumble me about, try to pull me under and leave me gasping for air. Writing is one of the many ways I push through. Behind the playful creative writing prompts of Amotissé,(find them here) I am journaling, participating in creative challenges, setting myself tasks, making new rituals and what I hope will be memorable moments. I am doing things I wouldn’t have done if it weren’t for being in isolation right now, valuable things. This time is an unexpected, involuntary and strange gift. I feel happy to share with you whatever peculiar and wondrous fruits we may find along the way. The Secrets of the Universe in 100 Symbols by Sarah Bartlett
Not so long ago, I began my Tarot journey. Well being and self nurturing were on the agenda, I was seeking a bit of guidance and solace during an emotionally challenging year. Time, place and circumstance took care of the rest. I went to my first lesson and haven’t looked back! I’m not a total newbie to new age wonders. The esoteric world has long fascinated my curious mind though I’ve only ever dabbled here and there, as you do. A bit of astrology, runes, looking at cards with friends for fun. It never occurred to me how much I would learn and benefit from these teachings, or how much I would enjoy it. I use the Hermetic Tarot which are full of rich symbolism, including astrological, numerical, mythological, angelic, geomantic, sephirotic and kabbalistic elements. Tarot is all about universal imagery and symbols. Tarot helps in finding perspective, an objective overview, intertwined with our inner tuition and a good dose of universal/divine assistance. Developing and trusting my intuitive skills is powerful! It feels like a rush-y wave washing over you, seemingly suddenly learning falls into place and becomes knowing. Tarot is more involved than I imagined. The process of meditation and ritual, prepare, ground and guide you. Trusting your intuition does the rest. So far the study of tarot has been a therapeutical journey of self reflection, self-awareness and creative personal development, rekindling many past interests. I’m a hippy chick at heart. I find solace in nature, creativity and the world around me, so no wonder learning Tarot has awakened my sense of connection to the universe. I am often in awe of how intrinsically one thing so comfortably links to everything else, like a network of intricate veins or the ripple effect. Wonder lust indeed. Let me know if you fancy a reading. Here is some list fun via Pip at http://meetmeatmikes.com/30-questions-answers/
Pass it on! 30 questions and answers 1. Who are you named after? No one 2. Last time you cried? Last week, today? Some recent sappy book/movie weepiness 3. Do you like your handwriting? Sure do. 4. What is your favourite meat? Groovy veggie chic 5. Longest relationship? 9 years 6. Do you still have your tonsils? Yes 7. Would you bungee jump? Nope 8. What is your favourite cereal? Crunchy clusters 9. Do you untie your shoes when you take them off? Yes 10. Do you think you’re strong? Figuratively speaking... 11. Favourite ice cream? Chocolat 12. What is the first thing you notice about a person? Their energy 13. Football or rugby? Neither 14. What colour trousers are you wearing? I’m not. 15. Last thing you ate? Mushroom and broccoli stroganoff 16. What are you listening to? The cat purr 17. If you were a crayon, what colour would you be ? Deep red 18. What is your favourite smell? Rain, sandalwood, patchouli, lavender, frangipani 19. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? Nat 20. Hair colour? Dark brown usually dyed red 21. Eye colour? Blue 22. Favourite foods to eat? Cheese and olives, laksa 23. Scary movies or happy endings? Happy endings 24. Last movie you watched? Woman at war Sing Street 25. What colour shirt are you wearing? A many coloured patterned dress 26. What is your favourite holiday? Camping, road trip, exploring 27. Beer or wine? Wine 28. Night owl or morning person? Hoot hoot 29. If you could live anywhere, where would it be? So many places! Though not sure if I have a forever place... 30. Favourite day of the week? Friday...the weekend begins. Check out more list inspiration here https://pin.it/8J6ya63 |
AuthorFor me, it seems there is not much difference between wondering and wandering. It has always helped me find inspiration. Creative dabbling is good for the soul, I couldn't imagine life without it and often surprise myself by what I come up with. Archives
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